theres alot of stff in my mind. sch. results. pfft. rumours. being a victim of a bad joke. a frend being cold due to ppl's talks? ridiculous. arrgh. gp proj also gvng me pressure seeing tt i need to do the speech. mt proj report still ned to be done but i cnt cntct the others! arrgh! what else??? ouh ya. tt someone occupying every free moment of my free mind. actually even during lesson sometimes. our past suddenly flahes in my mind. i try to block. but its really hard. i wish i had the pensive dumbledore has so i can keep all our memories and get it out of mind mind a t the same time. as what i heard and feel that i is true, its hard to forget someone when your heart is still loving him. haha. let go dee.
i dont want to hate you. its not something i can bring myself to do. i dont even want to
try to dislike you. but why? just why do you try and make things so bad to make me hate u? that day. i txt you salutation and to pray that you have a great day. in turn, you replied shits. i dont know why. baby, i've move on. i'm moving on. your meanness towards me now is holding me back i dont know why. but it just does.. you still make me cry everynight before sleep. i want to stop. but having u as my
past stops me. that's it. you. my past. i hate the fact that it is the past. i know i have to accept it now. i accepted it long ago. i just need to get used to it. i'm really trying to adapt. but u're just mean to make me think that you're a
mistake in my life. i don't want to think that i made a mistake being with you. i just wana express that i am blessed to have been loved by you than never have felt your love at all. a friend told me to think of the worse moments together but i just kind find them cause after every fight. i just chuck all those worse moments down the drain. i don't want to live a life regretting every moments i fight with you. i want to remember that you've made me grow. u matured me to a better person. i'm thankful. you've changed me when i met you. personally. i think i've changed alot when i was with you. you taught me patience, endurance and love. thanks to you after break up, i'm able to be patient and also endure the most toughest time i've ever experience in life so far. thank you hamzah. i know i am not able to wish you happy birthday next week.. cause you told me to not have any contacts with you. i will. i guess. hence, im gona deidcate a post to you next week. i hope you wont be angry or protest. you're a friend now. that's what i do for friends. i still love you.only as a friend now. (
i hope so. i tink i can do that soon)
