c'mon la.. fine! i'm useless... thanks alot for calling your own daughter that. how i appreciate that comment! omg. seriously. its my sis own RESPONSIBILITY to photocopy her damn birthcert and all if she wants to go for a job interview.. evn if she wants to ask hel from me.. atleast text me or call.. DUMB! fancy leaving a note on the dining table which i do not even sit on nor do i even look at it.. LIKE HELLO! what is modern technology for anyway? too lazy to type and message?call me at eight when i'm looking after sml sis and can blame me for not looking at the dining table. stupid or what? if i wan to eat also.. i will go into the kitchen and look for food at the kitchen table. not the dining table located in the living room+platform. dumbass! if u were clever enough or even had a little common sense, you would have told auntie wita to pass the note to me or even just tell her to tell me that you have left me a note. for god sake. i reached home almost 7 and i was waiting for my break-fast time. can't expect me to just go out right? hell no im not doing it.. to get even one person here to help me is like an old lady trying to lift dumbbells.. its just impossible.... so, guess what?! i don't care man!
and ya... why do the two of you just have to pick on me everytime when you get home.? what is the other two for? and you know what? i can NEVER study at home. WHY? BECAUSE OF YOUR OTHER 3 BELOVED DAUGHTERS WHO THINK OF THEMSELVES ONLY! if sis is at home, she will either eat, sleep or talk on the fone and ya.. MAKE ALOT OF NOISE. if the other two bratz are at home, THEY MAKE ALOT OF NOISE! by fighting, shouting and all the other stuff! do you know that all this are making me crazy? i've got no one to talk to freely at home. i can't even stduy in my own home because sis can't be bothered to scold the sml kids and i have to that which makes me lose ALOT of time because they are stubborn and will not listen to auntie.. and i have to shout and ask them to shut their **** up!
how am i suppse to concentrate and study at this rate? you just asked me to skip tuition just to help you to do some selling thingy at arab street taman warisan there that we usually do during fasting mnth. do you have any idea when my prelims is?! ouh ya. you don't know because why?!
CAUSE YOU DONT BOTHER TO CARE! that is why. you all know when my sis is werking when she is not. when she wants to go for another job interview , when sha2 and nana classes and activities are. but do you even know if i have any performances,MTP,competition or examinations coming up. if you say i'm old enough to look after myself. what about sis? isnt she older than me? isnt she suppose to be the one who is suppose to hold the most responsibilty among us siblings? i just have no idea what to say anymore about you guys right now. i don't feel i belong in class.. neither do i feel that i belong to this family. thanks for calling me useless dad =)
well.... in sch. it was a test of my patience when step,shujun and reen teased me bout something that i rather not say here. i usually would flare up and get irritated. i was but i tried to calm myself down as much as i could and laugh along with them. thanks to fasting, i now can control my emotions and anger better. =) as long as i live.. i'll face the test HE has given me and try my best to be patient at all times...
there is a reason why i need atleast one of you to talk to me.. because i don't feel i belong here.. now, the talk time has gone, how lonely i am.. i don't think many can understand. i just need a friend to laugh with..not a shoulder to cry on. i noe you guys too have your own prblems to deal with.. the thing is, talking to you guys, my problems just disappear.. you guys make me calm.i'm sorry to have every troubled the both of you...im sorry...i just hopre to get through this without hurting myself and add on to the scars in my heart...
